There Is No Power...

There is no white power, nor black power. No brown, no yellow. No Christian, no Jew, no Muslim, nor any other division created by humanity. 

There are but three divisions, those are of love, hate and apathy. The last one listed is perhaps the most dangerous and insidious. I can understand where some apathy comes from. It's hard to openly care about something, anything, these days. And even harder to voice your concern. Take a look at your social media and read the vile comments, some on the most benign posts.

Those vile comments usually come from a place of hurt, which has festered into hate. Their hate turns into our apathy. Many slowly lose their ability to love/care, thus allowing apathy to creep into their daily routine. These same people become increasingly self-concerned and defensive.

As they/we become increasingly "self" orientated, we lose the ability to extend ourselves outside of our comfort zone. This allows the hate to grow, to manifest into a controlling entity. Only then do we see a push back from the masses. Sometimes, that happens too late to constrain.

           

Usually, hate can be pushed back into the shadows of existence. Unfortunately, it can’t be eliminated. Understanding this helps us to be conscious and resilient.

           

As love will find those of a similar persuasion, so will hate. Apathy is safe, and it too will find those of a similar ilk. Love and hate will always go head to head in the battle for dominance. Because love can be passive, and hate aggressive, hate will slither into those shadows and await its next opportunity, its next excuse to try and take control.

           

Love, hate and apathy, these three levels of being dominate our lives, our time here on Earth. Let us take our stance for love. Let us never fall to the lies of hate. And never let us fall into the false comfort of apathy.

Many Faiths have as their core a belief of compassion toward each other. How we treat each other embodies our relationship with our God, Higher Power or Positive Energy. When we live with kindness and charity, we live our Faith and we are in harmony with our Faith. We understand our Faith and we are exercising that understanding.

Hate is easy to understand, while apathy is easily overlooked. In Faith, apathy is condemned. In the Christian Bible, Luke 16:19-31, tells the story and effects of apathy. And it’s not pretty. At the same time hate should never be met with more hate, as this will only fuel the fire of hate. There is no simple or easy solution.

Earlier I stated that hate can’t be eliminated. It can, however, be minimized, but not with more hate.

May you always have to strength to LOVE!

by David E. Gonzales

Control, It's all about you.

There's only one thing you can control, and that is yourself. Once you understand that concept, you will be much more at peace in and with the world around you. Life is perceived as a peripheral experience; our emotions make life a personal experience. By understanding ourselves and learning to work with our natural emotions, we can and do become increasingly understanding and empathetic to the people and events around us. We are better able to handle ourselves within situations with a sense of peace by knowing we are in control of ourselves. And by allowing others to be themselves, it becomes easier to identify what kind of person they really are.

To listen to someone speak, without your personal filters glazing over their words, will allow anyone to see the reality the speaker lives in. Our preconceived ideas of another person will never even show up. We can take them as they present themselves. Listening without prejudice, is the dominant element.

The act of listening without thinking about a response is the prejudice to which referring to. Listening to the words spoken and thinking about the meaning of those words, both individually and as a whole, will help you understand the person speaking and the subject being addressed.

Many of us are more interested in responding than comprehending to what has been said. It is because of this, many of us miss the essence of the subject or idea being expressed. As we teach ourselves to listen we will also learn how to better express our personal ideas on any subject. Listening (and reading) are two of the best ways we can learn to express ourselves in a superior fashion. But listening is the only way to really learn about the person, any person.

Understanding a person will help you decide how you wish to proceed. Or if you want to proceed at all. You only have control over one thing, you. Make your decisions with all the tools you have; the ear being one of the most powerful.

Peace be with you always.

by David E. Gonzales

Grief, A Thought About:

We are physical beings, and as physical beings we understand the touch, smell, taste, and visual world by those measures. When we lose a loved one to death we grieve these physical losses of our loved one as if we have lost a measure of ourselves.

I think grief has as much to do with accepting death as it does anything else. I think we, as mortal beings, need to learn how to accept this loss both in the physical and spiritual sense. Part of acceptance has to do with how we understand our faith and what our faith tells us. When we or our loved ones pass away we are told, in our faith, there is no pain, no crying of tears, nor suffering by our loved ones. (Rev; 7: 16-17, Rev: 21: 4a).

I think if we truly believe this teaching it can have a comforting effect on our grieving.

I think also we need to understand that there’s a difference between letting go and forgetting. When we say we are letting go it has to do with the physical presence of our loved ones. We will keep our loved ones with us by our memories and the stories we share with others. As we remember them through these stories our minds recreate the sights, smells and sounds associated with our loved ones.

If we accept the loss of our loved ones and equally accept the understanding of our faith, I believe we can lessen the pain of grief and the time it takes to go through the process of our grief. By not accepting that our loved one has indeed passed away, by holding on to the physical sights, smells and sounds associated with our loved one, we grieve all the longer and all the harder and all the more intensely. This is not to suggest that this is a simple thing to do, it is not. However, by understanding our faith we can more easily and perhaps with less pain let go of the physical presence of our loved ones. While never forgetting our memories of them and realizing their new place with God can help us in our life’s many transitions.

Related posts;

Grief, what’s so good about it? - http://daedgo.blogspot.com/2012/10/grief-whats-so-good-about-it.html 

Tears - http://daedgo.blogspot.com/2014/07/tears.html 

Scripture is from the NABRE:

Rev. 7: 16-17: They will not hunger or thirst anymore, nor will the sun or any heat strike them. Thor the Lamb who is in the center of the throne will shepherd them and lead them to springs of life-giving water, and God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.”

Rev. 21: 4a; “He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there shall be no more death or mourning, wailing or pain,”

by David E. Gonzales

Relationships, I Believe

            I don't believe in one night stands,

                          I believe in relationships.

Oh sure a one night stand has some benefits, there is a physical need that is served. But the emotional and the psychological needs are far from satisfied. All positive relationships are grounded in mutual respect and care. A one night stand belies this positive aspect with the “me” factor being the driving purpose. The concern is in receiving and not in giving.

For me, as a person, to always have a goal to strive for brings a certain special passion to my life. To be in a continuing relationship with another where I am trying to understand, while not always agreeing with another, is to forever bring me closer to that person in my relationship with them. With God, and with people, this relationship can never be complete in this world and so the continuing effort to understand another is vital to the growth of any relationship.

I also think that a relationship should be with both partners as giving, and not so much with the give and take so often talked about. When you are in a relationship of give and take inevitably there is a score kept. This may not be a conscience score but more a feeling of dissatisfaction with one’s needs being met. If both partners are of a giving mode then there is less likely a feeling of need, as the need is fulfilled with the giving. This might be considered a “perfect” relationship, however “perfect” is a human impossibility.

Artist Unknown

I don't believe in “perfect”. I don't believe in the perfect relationship. Not even my relationship with God, as I understand God, is perfect. I believe somehow that is the point of our relationships, not to be perfect, but instead to forever being committed to, faithful to, and striving for the perfect relationship with another person. In faith this relationship would be our Spirituality. As human beings we are all different, imperfect, and unique and as such we have to work at it to get along. The more intimate the relationship the increasingly arduous the task. Along with the effort also comes the increased satisfaction of being.

In this type of relationship there is also risk. For being open and honest is a necessary element. Any time we are open and honest we expose ourselves to possible ridicule or embarrassment, either private or public. This of course is why I believe that all positive relationships are grounded in respect and care. Relationships that use a deception and/or manipulation as a foundation will lead to unhappiness and failure.

The euphoria of a new relationship can be quite alluring; this is almost always a short term emotion. Including your partner in your plans as you look to the future will help in your quest for a meaningful relationship. You may have noticed that I have not written here about “love”. I believe that love is rooted in charity and charity is giving without the expectation of a return, and giving without the expectation of a return, is love practiced and love defined. Above I stated that I believe that both partners should be as giving and not give and take. This in turn would lead to perfect love. But since I don't believe in perfect, there is the arduous task of understanding with respect and care for the heart of another.

I believe that for those willing to put forth the risk and effort of a relationship they will be increasingly successful, happy, and fulfilled people. Adding to this a good and positive Spirituality can only increase the satisfaction of any relationship.

Blessings to you of peace and love, always.

By David E. Gonzales